Antiquated Speech

“Then again, a walk in the park sounds like a rather nice affair.”
-Do retire.
“Splendid- save, retire? So soon? But brother, you have only now just eaten. Soon, your stomach will become a mass of gelatin and such an awful gaseous marmalade.”
-Quite right. I do say, your logic is marvelously impeccable. How do you come by such wisdom, in that you are a man only with such a few early years?
“I believe the question is not whether I have attained a fermentation of earthly years as a medal to wear about on my skin as clock of my age and subsequent equivalent wisdom, but rather the question that haunts your mind and mine, is why do we speak as we do? As though some mischievous entity behind the clocks has turned back time to enable such effect as a to cause a current antiquity in our dialect.”
-Quite fascinating indeed.